long days

It's been a couple of long days at work - had to rearrange my schedule to accommodate a project - two days in a row - and the project still has not been started. So I will have to rearrange my schedule next week as well. Sigh.

Found myself feeling QUITE grumpy this afternoon. Then I slid back down into the "I don't care" doldrums - I say "back" because I was hit hard and heavy by those "I don't care"isms yesterday.

Sigh. I guess I'm a creature of habit and when people or things or STUFF isn't as I think it should be or as I need it to be or is just generally out of whack that I just start a slippery slide.

It generally only takes me a day or two to get my normalcy all straightened back out. It helps that I am a generally positive person. It helps that I have a King who reigns and who hears my cries. (knowing this allows me to the the aforesaid generally positive person).

I hurt for my gorlie, Lessa. I hurt for my grands. I hurt knowing that my hurt is little compared to theirs. And yet, I still hurt.

It is HARD to watch your family hurting, you know? You want to somehow just take away the hurt - take it into yourself so that they can go on with their lives all happy-dappy.

but that doesn't happen.

it doesn't work that way.

I can't bear their pain for them.

I have to watch it tear them apart.

sigh!

drama mama, huh, Lessa?

back to happy-dappy land tomorrow maybe.

>..<

Posted by Purplemoose at September 15, 2005 10:52 PM